On this, a day of new beginnings and hope, I am reaching out to the readers of MuchAdo to appeal to your charitable spirit. Our lives are busy. It’s all too easy to get caught up in the day-to-day, and we often forget to take a moment to consider those in need. Today, I would like to ask you to consider contributing to a worthy cause that has all but escaped the attention of the mainstream media.
By now, I’m sure you’ve seen that SPCA commercial with Sara McLachlan where the one-eyed dog is eaten by some heartless dog-eating Republican (at least I think that’s what happens, but I don’t actually watch that commercial because it’s really, really a bummer). Well, this is, believe it or not, a much more worthy cause. No, it’s not starving children. No, not disaster relief. NOT UNICEF! Stop guessing! I started this post off by saying it “has all but escaped the attention of the mainstream media.” Why would you think you could just guess. As I was saying, this one is a doozy. A real heart stomper.
[Note: this would be a good time to click on that link for the SPCA commercial, and let it play in another window while you read the next bit. I would embed a stirring song here, but (a) I don’t really know how and (b) I’m pretty sure that would violate some sort of copyright, and who needs that mess. (Whatever you do, do not watch that commercial, it will totally ruin your day.)]
It turns out, in a country that has everything (well, at least 1% of this country has everything, supposedly the other 99% have nothing but time and hacky sacks, but I must admit I didn’t follow the Occupy [Insert Name of Someplace Here] movement all that closely), there are photographers who lack access to the most basic, high-end technology. What could be more disheartening than the thought of a photographer without the proper equipment? I am certain there is a photographer in your life that is struggling to make images with substandard equipment. I know in my heart that this is true. Oh sure, he (I strongly suspect the photographer in your life is male) may actually have an SLR. And to the outside world, it may seem that his images are perfectly adequate. But he knows that he is greatly in need of a new camera. And that knowledge alone is too much for any photographer to bear.
So, what exactly is it that this photographer needs? What he needs is the Canon 5D Mark III. (Again, I am positive the needy photographer in your life is a man, and I am positive he is not shooting with Nikon.) What’s that you say? You are not familiar with the Canon 5D Mark III? Well then, my friend, you are not a Canon enthusiast, for there are entire web pages devoted to the Canon 5D Mark III. Why, the fine folks at Canon Rumors have a whole page with dozens and dozens of posts devoted to this camera. Same for Keith Cooper over at Northlight Images.
Now, here’s where things get a little dodgy. Sadly, the Canon 5D Mark III does not exactly, in a literal, non-fictional sort of way, exist. Now, don’t get me wrong, it very much exists in the way that my four-year-old daughter’s stuffed bunny has been to college, lived in Mexico, Japan, various parts of Europe, California, and Chicago, has run a variety of successful businesses, and has magical powers, despite having been purchased by friends on what I have learned is a very ordinary, non-magical website shortly before my daughter’s birth. That is to say that the Canon 5D Mark III exists in the minds of all those Canon enthusiasts I mentioned, but not in a physical, mass production sort of way. And I . . . er, I mean . . . the poor, hard-working, saintly, deprived photographer in your life really, really wants the Canon 5D Mark III to exist — in a, “Hey, I think I’ll head over to my favorite photography shop/website and pick one up” kind of way, not a “Did I tell you about the time Bunny went to China on a flying dragon and ate won ton soup out of the holy grail” kind of way.
I know what you’re thinking. “But, what can I do?” Let’s be clear, I don’t have all the answers. I have identified the problem, now I am looking to you for help. I, for one, plan to continue reading all of the rumor websites so I will know the second the Canon 5D Mark III is just days away from being announced (which, at last count, has happened 468 times in the last twelve months alone). However, maybe you are close personal friends with Chuck Westfall (not to be confused with this guy) or someone else from the imaging group at Canon U.S.A. If so, for God’s sake, stop reading this right now and implore that person to release the Canon 5D Mark III (or better yet, get me . . . um, I mean your, oh, whatever . . . a test device — I’ll sign an NDA). In the meantime, please start saving your pennies (by which I mean twenties or hundreds), because I am fairly certain that MuchAdo will be launching a Needy Photographer Fundraiser once this camera is released. We are really going to need your help.